"Baking is a fun and fulfilling way of bonding with loved ones, but is it really all that great when baking is not your specialty?" --Reeghan Walsh, 8th Grade
The holidays are a great opportunity to spend time with loved ones and bake delicious and beautiful treats. Whether it’s making food from long standing family traditions, or just decorating gingerbread houses, there is always something to do. But when you’re challenged in the kitchen, things can get, to say the least, a little tough.
So I took it upon myself, as a less-than-adequate baker, to try to bake typical holiday treats, and see if they could come out semi-edible.
So I took it upon myself, as a less-than-adequate baker, to try to bake typical holiday treats, and see if they could come out semi-edible.
When I think of holiday treats, my mind goes to cookies, so I hopped on Google and looked up some common holiday cookies. The list I chose was really not the right one because it was giving me cookies like “cowboy cookies,” whatever those are. But eventually I found a good cookie that seemed relatively easy to begin with: sugar cookies.
I searched long and hard for a sugar cookie recipe that would be perfect and easy (I did not search long or hard, but just clicked on the first result from Google).
I began my journey on a high note: by ripping the flour bag open and spilling flour all over the counter. Then I mixed the flour, salt, and baking powder in a sifter and sifted, as one does. The mixture may or may not have spilled over the top of the bowl because I wasn’t giving it my full attention, but the music I was listening to was really quite nice, so I was a bit preoccupied.
Then, I pulled out the mixer, eager to mix the sugar and butter together until they were a “light color.” Immediately, contents of the bowl began to fly everywhere, despite the mixer being on the lowest setting. I tried to brave it, but I knew eventually a big splat would end it all, so I decided to call in some help from one, Kim Walsh.
At first, she mocked me for my now intense fear of the mixer, but once she too, faced its wrath, she switched tactics: folding it in with a spatula. It was all going well, and I looked away for a moment to record how the process had been going so far, until I heard a snap from the other side of the kitchen. I glanced over to find Walsh Sr. standing staring at me, with two ends of a spatula in her hand. We went back to the mixer.
After we had gotten that sorted out, I went back to solo work and attempted to add the flour compound to the sugar compound. This did not work because apparently, you are not supposed to just pour straight from the flour bowl, and you must use a cup to make it easier. It was at this moment that Walsh Sr. returned and refused to let me continue this on my own.
This whole process should not have taken so long (tenish minutes), but the mixer we were using was not good and the dough kept sticking to it. We ended up having to switch the mixer thingies, which worked a little better. Really, all this could have been avoided if the Incident of December of 2021 had never occurred, in which the mixer was broken by an immoral guest.
We finally finished that and set the dough in the fridge for a few hours. Since I had time to kill, I decided to clean up the absolute mess that was the assembly of the sugar cookies. One thing about cleaning up, it should not create more messes, however, accidents happen.
Let me explain my side of the story: I was putting away the salt, and I thought it was closed, but there really is no way to tell. So I went to put it in the cupboard and (I don’t even know how to explain this) I pulled my hand back (the one occupying the salt), and it flew over my shoulder, onto the floor and into my hair. But it’s okay! Throwing salt over your shoulder is good!
Three hours later, I pulled the dough out of the fridge and began to attempt to roll it out. But no matter which way I tried (kneading and using a rolling pin), the dough just kept breaking apart. The recipe did say to only keep the dough in for two hours, but it was only an hour more and how bad could that really be? Walsh Sr. had a different theory, and quickly accused me of using the wrong measurements. Walsh Sr. sorted it out by splitting the dough in half and rolling one out at a time. We cut our shapes, decorated them, and threw them into the oven.
Now, the oven said that it was preheated to 375 degrees, however the inside thermometer claimed it to be 400, so we adjusted the baking time to less (5 minutes).
The baking went okay. The cookies came out slightly raw, but there was just one egg in all of the dough, so it’s fine.
Here are the taste test results: They tasted like your average sugar cookies. Some felt a little raw in the middle, but it wasn’t all that noticeable. The tastes varied slightly depending on the sprinkles used. I think the cookies would have been less enjoyable if I didn’t remember the war that I went through trying to make them.
Overall Score: 8/10
I searched long and hard for a sugar cookie recipe that would be perfect and easy (I did not search long or hard, but just clicked on the first result from Google).
I began my journey on a high note: by ripping the flour bag open and spilling flour all over the counter. Then I mixed the flour, salt, and baking powder in a sifter and sifted, as one does. The mixture may or may not have spilled over the top of the bowl because I wasn’t giving it my full attention, but the music I was listening to was really quite nice, so I was a bit preoccupied.
Then, I pulled out the mixer, eager to mix the sugar and butter together until they were a “light color.” Immediately, contents of the bowl began to fly everywhere, despite the mixer being on the lowest setting. I tried to brave it, but I knew eventually a big splat would end it all, so I decided to call in some help from one, Kim Walsh.
At first, she mocked me for my now intense fear of the mixer, but once she too, faced its wrath, she switched tactics: folding it in with a spatula. It was all going well, and I looked away for a moment to record how the process had been going so far, until I heard a snap from the other side of the kitchen. I glanced over to find Walsh Sr. standing staring at me, with two ends of a spatula in her hand. We went back to the mixer.
After we had gotten that sorted out, I went back to solo work and attempted to add the flour compound to the sugar compound. This did not work because apparently, you are not supposed to just pour straight from the flour bowl, and you must use a cup to make it easier. It was at this moment that Walsh Sr. returned and refused to let me continue this on my own.
This whole process should not have taken so long (tenish minutes), but the mixer we were using was not good and the dough kept sticking to it. We ended up having to switch the mixer thingies, which worked a little better. Really, all this could have been avoided if the Incident of December of 2021 had never occurred, in which the mixer was broken by an immoral guest.
We finally finished that and set the dough in the fridge for a few hours. Since I had time to kill, I decided to clean up the absolute mess that was the assembly of the sugar cookies. One thing about cleaning up, it should not create more messes, however, accidents happen.
Let me explain my side of the story: I was putting away the salt, and I thought it was closed, but there really is no way to tell. So I went to put it in the cupboard and (I don’t even know how to explain this) I pulled my hand back (the one occupying the salt), and it flew over my shoulder, onto the floor and into my hair. But it’s okay! Throwing salt over your shoulder is good!
Three hours later, I pulled the dough out of the fridge and began to attempt to roll it out. But no matter which way I tried (kneading and using a rolling pin), the dough just kept breaking apart. The recipe did say to only keep the dough in for two hours, but it was only an hour more and how bad could that really be? Walsh Sr. had a different theory, and quickly accused me of using the wrong measurements. Walsh Sr. sorted it out by splitting the dough in half and rolling one out at a time. We cut our shapes, decorated them, and threw them into the oven.
Now, the oven said that it was preheated to 375 degrees, however the inside thermometer claimed it to be 400, so we adjusted the baking time to less (5 minutes).
The baking went okay. The cookies came out slightly raw, but there was just one egg in all of the dough, so it’s fine.
Here are the taste test results: They tasted like your average sugar cookies. Some felt a little raw in the middle, but it wasn’t all that noticeable. The tastes varied slightly depending on the sprinkles used. I think the cookies would have been less enjoyable if I didn’t remember the war that I went through trying to make them.
Overall Score: 8/10
Whilst surfing the internet, Walsh Sr found a recipe for a fancy treat I’d never heard of before: candy cane cookies. That sounded festive enough, so I decided to give it a try. With Mariah Carey fueling my energy, I got started.
The start was much less rocky this time. I only got a bit of powdered sugar on the counter and the mixing was going relatively well. But then, of course, the mixer thingies weren’t mixing, so I went to grab a spatula. Walsh Sr immediately stopped me before anything could go further. I put the spatula down, with a normal amount of force I might add, and the handle broke. Another fallen soldier. At least this one is still usable, just not hangable. I used a big spoon to break down the big clumps instead.
When I finished mixing the butter and powdered sugar together, I was ready to add in the other ingredients. Because I have terrible precision, (and will never even dare to think about becoming a surgeon) I crack my eggs in a separate bowl. While cracking my egg, somehow my finger got stuck inside it and I spilled half the egg onto the counter. It wasn’t that noticeable visually, but the counter was definitely egg-y.
Mixing went pretty smoothly, except for when I almost sprayed the dough everywhere trying to get pieces of it from the sides of the bowl, but that’s fine. Also, the turbo button is very inconveniently placed right where you’re supposed to rest your hand and that led to some near death happenings, but in the end, it was all okay.
But then, the flour came into play.
After two days of baking and having mishaps mostly with flour, I’m starting to think the flour is the problem. I opened the bag and instantly spilled some. I did my best to ignore the screaming in my mind and went to get a cup of flour. I dumped it into the dough and witnessed four bay leaves (which are put in flour to keep bugs out) tumble out of that scoop alone, so I had to pick through and take them out. Three more cups of flour later, and I was done.
Since the batter is candy canes, you have to split the dough into two sections and put red dye in one of them. The recipe tells you to just simply split it in half. I am terrible at eyeballing things. But, I did quite well this time, and I was feeling exceptionally proud of myself. I should not have had the level of confidence I had going into the next two steps. The recipe says to make a one-inch thick disc from the dough to refrigerate, so I got out a measuring tape to measure my disc. It took me three tries to get it even remotely right, and at that point I just gave up and threw it in the fridge.
Then, I went to open the red food dye, which spreads like a disease. I hadn’t even opened it and it was already on my hands, and then a puddle of it somehow spilled on the counter, and now (while very hard to see) there is a section of my counter stained red. And then of course you have to knead the dye into the dough so my hands were completely consumed by the evil thing. But while I was kneading, I found so many small bits of bay leaves I just knew they were going to be in the final product. Then I stuck that half of the dough into the fridge. The recipe says either put them in for one hour or overnight, which is a very different timeframe, but it’s a professional recipe, so it’s got to be credible.
This next part I did not enjoy. Nothing went wrong, it was just kind of boring and tedious. I had to roll out small bits of each of the doughs, and then cross them together and form them into a candy cane shape. It took awhile and getting them to look nice was pretty much impossible. Walsh Sr. came to help out and found a pretty good method for twisting the red and the white together: sticking them together and then twisting in opposite directions on opposite ends. However, the pieces I made were too long and they kept breaking, so I guess you could say something went wrong. Nonetheless we threw them in the oven and let them bake.
Right after I pulled them out of the oven, I added some crushed candy cane onto them, let them cool down, and then tasted them.
The final results: They were dry. Very dry. And also, for all the peppermint extract I put in, the only peppermint I could really taste was from the crushed candy canes on top, which was kind of disappointing. The actual cookie tasted like a butter cookie and they looked nice. Plus they grow on you the more you eat them.
Overall score: 6/10.
The start was much less rocky this time. I only got a bit of powdered sugar on the counter and the mixing was going relatively well. But then, of course, the mixer thingies weren’t mixing, so I went to grab a spatula. Walsh Sr immediately stopped me before anything could go further. I put the spatula down, with a normal amount of force I might add, and the handle broke. Another fallen soldier. At least this one is still usable, just not hangable. I used a big spoon to break down the big clumps instead.
When I finished mixing the butter and powdered sugar together, I was ready to add in the other ingredients. Because I have terrible precision, (and will never even dare to think about becoming a surgeon) I crack my eggs in a separate bowl. While cracking my egg, somehow my finger got stuck inside it and I spilled half the egg onto the counter. It wasn’t that noticeable visually, but the counter was definitely egg-y.
Mixing went pretty smoothly, except for when I almost sprayed the dough everywhere trying to get pieces of it from the sides of the bowl, but that’s fine. Also, the turbo button is very inconveniently placed right where you’re supposed to rest your hand and that led to some near death happenings, but in the end, it was all okay.
But then, the flour came into play.
After two days of baking and having mishaps mostly with flour, I’m starting to think the flour is the problem. I opened the bag and instantly spilled some. I did my best to ignore the screaming in my mind and went to get a cup of flour. I dumped it into the dough and witnessed four bay leaves (which are put in flour to keep bugs out) tumble out of that scoop alone, so I had to pick through and take them out. Three more cups of flour later, and I was done.
Since the batter is candy canes, you have to split the dough into two sections and put red dye in one of them. The recipe tells you to just simply split it in half. I am terrible at eyeballing things. But, I did quite well this time, and I was feeling exceptionally proud of myself. I should not have had the level of confidence I had going into the next two steps. The recipe says to make a one-inch thick disc from the dough to refrigerate, so I got out a measuring tape to measure my disc. It took me three tries to get it even remotely right, and at that point I just gave up and threw it in the fridge.
Then, I went to open the red food dye, which spreads like a disease. I hadn’t even opened it and it was already on my hands, and then a puddle of it somehow spilled on the counter, and now (while very hard to see) there is a section of my counter stained red. And then of course you have to knead the dye into the dough so my hands were completely consumed by the evil thing. But while I was kneading, I found so many small bits of bay leaves I just knew they were going to be in the final product. Then I stuck that half of the dough into the fridge. The recipe says either put them in for one hour or overnight, which is a very different timeframe, but it’s a professional recipe, so it’s got to be credible.
This next part I did not enjoy. Nothing went wrong, it was just kind of boring and tedious. I had to roll out small bits of each of the doughs, and then cross them together and form them into a candy cane shape. It took awhile and getting them to look nice was pretty much impossible. Walsh Sr. came to help out and found a pretty good method for twisting the red and the white together: sticking them together and then twisting in opposite directions on opposite ends. However, the pieces I made were too long and they kept breaking, so I guess you could say something went wrong. Nonetheless we threw them in the oven and let them bake.
Right after I pulled them out of the oven, I added some crushed candy cane onto them, let them cool down, and then tasted them.
The final results: They were dry. Very dry. And also, for all the peppermint extract I put in, the only peppermint I could really taste was from the crushed candy canes on top, which was kind of disappointing. The actual cookie tasted like a butter cookie and they looked nice. Plus they grow on you the more you eat them.
Overall score: 6/10.
Gingerbread cookies are a total classic when it comes to the holidays. Decorating them with friends is super fun, and there are so many things you can do with them. You can make gingerbread houses, gingerbread men, and many other shapes. For this recipe, I made gingerbread people.
The beginning started off fine, except for the revelation that molasses is not in fact slow, like everybody claims. This was a heartbreaking thing to discover. Additionally, there was no mixer to spray the contents of the bowl everywhere this time, just some good old fashioned hand stirring. Yet somehow, the flour still managed to fly out of the bowl. Did I mention that flour was involved? It was not fun. When I opened the bag, it spilled everywhere. The flour is definitely the problem. But I did take the bay leaves out of the flour before I poured it in (somehow I still found bay leaf bits in the dough). Regardless, there are worse mixing methods than a mechanical method. I cannot hand mix. I witnessed this as the mixture spilled out the bowl and onto my hands and really just everywhere.
After a while of this process, I finished, but the dough was quite dry and crumbly. The instructions said that if the dough was too sticky, to add in some extra flour, but I put in the bare minimum. After a while of scrolling through the very long and confusing article, I found a tip that said if it was too dry to add milk a tablespoon at a time. After that, the dough was better, and ready to be refrigerated.
When I took the dough out of the fridge I began to roll it out on the saran wrap, as the recipe didn’t say where to do it. The dough warmed very fast, even after we gave it extra time in the fridge after being in the freezer. After I cut them, I baked them, and then it was decorating time. Decorating gave me a lot of artistic freedom, and there were many fun things to do with the icing.
When it comes to tasting, here are my final thoughts: Now is a good time to mention that I don’t like gingerbread. I thought I could overcome my dislike for it for the sake of tasting them, but I could not. The cookies were chewy and far too gingery. They were better with frosting, than without. I could not go farther than this when it came to taste testing.
Overall score: 5/10
The beginning started off fine, except for the revelation that molasses is not in fact slow, like everybody claims. This was a heartbreaking thing to discover. Additionally, there was no mixer to spray the contents of the bowl everywhere this time, just some good old fashioned hand stirring. Yet somehow, the flour still managed to fly out of the bowl. Did I mention that flour was involved? It was not fun. When I opened the bag, it spilled everywhere. The flour is definitely the problem. But I did take the bay leaves out of the flour before I poured it in (somehow I still found bay leaf bits in the dough). Regardless, there are worse mixing methods than a mechanical method. I cannot hand mix. I witnessed this as the mixture spilled out the bowl and onto my hands and really just everywhere.
After a while of this process, I finished, but the dough was quite dry and crumbly. The instructions said that if the dough was too sticky, to add in some extra flour, but I put in the bare minimum. After a while of scrolling through the very long and confusing article, I found a tip that said if it was too dry to add milk a tablespoon at a time. After that, the dough was better, and ready to be refrigerated.
When I took the dough out of the fridge I began to roll it out on the saran wrap, as the recipe didn’t say where to do it. The dough warmed very fast, even after we gave it extra time in the fridge after being in the freezer. After I cut them, I baked them, and then it was decorating time. Decorating gave me a lot of artistic freedom, and there were many fun things to do with the icing.
When it comes to tasting, here are my final thoughts: Now is a good time to mention that I don’t like gingerbread. I thought I could overcome my dislike for it for the sake of tasting them, but I could not. The cookies were chewy and far too gingery. They were better with frosting, than without. I could not go farther than this when it came to taste testing.
Overall score: 5/10
Since the first three treats have been cookies, I wanted to do something different, so I made fudge. I actually wasn’t aware this was a holiday treat until Walsh Sr. brought it to my attention. Anyways, this is how it went.
In all honesty, it was quite uneventful. There were only three ingredients, and they were easy enough to mix. Walsh Sr. kept stressing the importance of going fast, so I felt a bit rushed pulling the bowl out of the oven to add the final ingredient, but for the most part it was much more relaxing than all the other recipes. I threw it in the fridge after fully mixing it, and the end taste was fantastic.
For the tasting: The fudge was amazing! It tasted great! Not too rich, and not anything gross. It leaves an interesting aftertaste in my mouth that I don’t hate. The taste was familiar, and I now realize that it tastes like frosting.
Overall: 9/10, because there is no such thing as perfect.
In all honesty, it was quite uneventful. There were only three ingredients, and they were easy enough to mix. Walsh Sr. kept stressing the importance of going fast, so I felt a bit rushed pulling the bowl out of the oven to add the final ingredient, but for the most part it was much more relaxing than all the other recipes. I threw it in the fridge after fully mixing it, and the end taste was fantastic.
For the tasting: The fudge was amazing! It tasted great! Not too rich, and not anything gross. It leaves an interesting aftertaste in my mouth that I don’t hate. The taste was familiar, and I now realize that it tastes like frosting.
Overall: 9/10, because there is no such thing as perfect.
In full, this attempt was probably the worst, which seems backwards. I should have learned something from all the other recipes. But it seemed I would not be going out without a bang. Even with just gathering the ingredients I struggled. I put an egg onto the counter and it rolled right off, onto the floor.
After that incident, I began shredding apples in the food processor. But the apples kept getting stuck in it, so Walsh Sr. took over doing that while I combined the rest of the ingredients together. Then, came the ultimate showdown. The finale.
My archenemy, flour, approached. I readied my cup, preparing to take down any bay leaves in my way. Yet somehow, they passed my defenses and made their way into the bowl, so once again I had to pick them out. Bay leaves: 2 Me: 0
Next, I got to whisk! For some reason I really enjoy whisking. But as I was stirring, I found another bay leaf. I went to take it out and upon doing so, I found another bay leaf hiding underneath it. And as Walsh Sr. was peering over my shoulder, she found one too! Those evil little devils, sneaking this way and that!
When the mixing was done I took a moment to admire my creation that looked like the barf of a child who had a strict diet of apples. Then, I began to add the topping on the top of the dough. However, the instructions were unclear to me and I began adding each individual ingredient of the topping instead of mixing it together and then adding it. I had gotten as far as the sugar before I realized something wasn’t right and Walsh Sr. stopped me. She successfully got the sugar out of the bowl and into a separate one, where I could finish mixing the topping ingredients together. I finished that and then added it to the top of the dough.
Also, Walsh Sr.’s phone ended up in the mixing bowl for a moment, because I am so good at not being clumsy. The cake went into the oven.
The final taste test results: The cake tasted a lot like water. And apples. The topping (which ended up on the bottom due to the flipping of the cake out of the pan) was pretty good, and the cake tasted better with whipped cream.
Overall score: 6/10.
After that incident, I began shredding apples in the food processor. But the apples kept getting stuck in it, so Walsh Sr. took over doing that while I combined the rest of the ingredients together. Then, came the ultimate showdown. The finale.
My archenemy, flour, approached. I readied my cup, preparing to take down any bay leaves in my way. Yet somehow, they passed my defenses and made their way into the bowl, so once again I had to pick them out. Bay leaves: 2 Me: 0
Next, I got to whisk! For some reason I really enjoy whisking. But as I was stirring, I found another bay leaf. I went to take it out and upon doing so, I found another bay leaf hiding underneath it. And as Walsh Sr. was peering over my shoulder, she found one too! Those evil little devils, sneaking this way and that!
When the mixing was done I took a moment to admire my creation that looked like the barf of a child who had a strict diet of apples. Then, I began to add the topping on the top of the dough. However, the instructions were unclear to me and I began adding each individual ingredient of the topping instead of mixing it together and then adding it. I had gotten as far as the sugar before I realized something wasn’t right and Walsh Sr. stopped me. She successfully got the sugar out of the bowl and into a separate one, where I could finish mixing the topping ingredients together. I finished that and then added it to the top of the dough.
Also, Walsh Sr.’s phone ended up in the mixing bowl for a moment, because I am so good at not being clumsy. The cake went into the oven.
The final taste test results: The cake tasted a lot like water. And apples. The topping (which ended up on the bottom due to the flipping of the cake out of the pan) was pretty good, and the cake tasted better with whipped cream.
Overall score: 6/10.
So baking is probably not the best for me, and after all of it I’ve done the past few days, I’d be happy to stay away from it for a while. Now I have a bunch of treats that aren’t even that good, and a hate for flour. Happy holidays!