"How do you feel about gladiator fights? What about in school?" -- celeste eagleton, 8th grade
The following article is a special May investigation by the OSA Shallot staff, aiming to bring you the very best of the campus' fake news.
How do you feel about gladiator fights? What about in school? OSA, Oakland School of the Arts, has started doing gladiator fights for their students instead of the standard student testing within the state.
The CAASPP, or California Assessment of Student Performance and Progress, is a statewide assessment system, used by California public schools. It includes computer-based tests in English language arts or literacy, math, and science for students in grades 3-8, plus 11. The CAASPP tests are used to measure student performance and progress, as well as to ensure that all students are prepared for college and their careers. Despite this being the standard testing, OSA (Oakland School of the Arts), has been convinced that their students are brutal and ruthless enough to do gladiator fighting instead of CAASPP testing .
These gladiator fights will be testing for knowledge in weapons usage as it is very popular in American culture. Also testing for common sense in students, the real important stuff. OSA aims to prepare students to be well prepared for the dangers of the world, but also to be responsible adults with a good sense of judgement Gladiator fights have proven to be more effective in testing whether or not the student is being well prepared for the outside world.
I interviewed Mr. Harpy for their thoughts on the matter. “Although some people might feel a bit mixed on the topic, I feel as if this is a better way of testing than CAASPP. I have had students tell me they were just too nervous during CAASPP testing days, and I think these gladiator fights can help them relieve stress.”
Pedro Pascal, a famous gladiator fighter of this time, has also approved of this style of testing. “I think this is great! It gives children the opportunity to grow in a challenging environment where there is a lot of motivation to be stronger.” And as he is a real gladiator, having fought in a recent documentary, who could question his judgment?
These fights have been taking place at Henry J. Kaiser Memorial Park right by the school. Each period of the school day, students are sent to the park for gladiator fights. During lunch, it’s feeding time for the students, and around those hours many students of OSA can be seen there. We have made sure to survey students on the fighting schedule so they feel prepared. In this style of testing, the average scores have been decreasing. This decreases our funding for the school, however, this style of testing allows groups of students to be more successful than others.
How exactly do these students end up being more successful? Bullying is something common in most schools, and it can impact students' mental health. So not only will it allow wimpy students to navigate difficult situations, it will also allow them to stick up for themselves. Mental health is an important factor in productivity, and if we focus on the students' well-being over setting high standards, it will also allow students to be more comfortable in finding their own hobbies and finish assignments with less stress. These gladiator fights will also allow frustrated students to take out their frustrations in more appropriate situations instead of in school where we have to deal with it.
Although many teachers and gladiators find this successful, other schools who may not share the same opinions as OSA staff, seem concerned. One anonymous school reached out to Literary Arts and asked for some of the students' opinions and if they felt safe. An excited 8th student at OSA requested to be interviewed on the matter. “I’m unsure if I can live through one more fight! They have held us captive here and won’t let me leave!” Other schools found this interview helpful, saying it helped them in answering their question.
The students here at OSA can barely hold their excitement together as the roaring crowds of OSA staff cheer them on, boosting students' confidence as the staff bet on them. No more food for a week, Gregory. Maybe when you’re hungry, next time you’ll fight with more enthusiasm.
Other students requested to also be let in on the matter, wanting their opinions heard. Sadly, there are too many for us to pick! Their enthusiasm sickens me. What disgusting selfish beings. Here at OSA, we care deeply about each student! Our staff will all interview the students and make sure they feel heard!
How do you feel about gladiator fights? What about in school? OSA, Oakland School of the Arts, has started doing gladiator fights for their students instead of the standard student testing within the state.
The CAASPP, or California Assessment of Student Performance and Progress, is a statewide assessment system, used by California public schools. It includes computer-based tests in English language arts or literacy, math, and science for students in grades 3-8, plus 11. The CAASPP tests are used to measure student performance and progress, as well as to ensure that all students are prepared for college and their careers. Despite this being the standard testing, OSA (Oakland School of the Arts), has been convinced that their students are brutal and ruthless enough to do gladiator fighting instead of CAASPP testing .
These gladiator fights will be testing for knowledge in weapons usage as it is very popular in American culture. Also testing for common sense in students, the real important stuff. OSA aims to prepare students to be well prepared for the dangers of the world, but also to be responsible adults with a good sense of judgement Gladiator fights have proven to be more effective in testing whether or not the student is being well prepared for the outside world.
I interviewed Mr. Harpy for their thoughts on the matter. “Although some people might feel a bit mixed on the topic, I feel as if this is a better way of testing than CAASPP. I have had students tell me they were just too nervous during CAASPP testing days, and I think these gladiator fights can help them relieve stress.”
Pedro Pascal, a famous gladiator fighter of this time, has also approved of this style of testing. “I think this is great! It gives children the opportunity to grow in a challenging environment where there is a lot of motivation to be stronger.” And as he is a real gladiator, having fought in a recent documentary, who could question his judgment?
These fights have been taking place at Henry J. Kaiser Memorial Park right by the school. Each period of the school day, students are sent to the park for gladiator fights. During lunch, it’s feeding time for the students, and around those hours many students of OSA can be seen there. We have made sure to survey students on the fighting schedule so they feel prepared. In this style of testing, the average scores have been decreasing. This decreases our funding for the school, however, this style of testing allows groups of students to be more successful than others.
How exactly do these students end up being more successful? Bullying is something common in most schools, and it can impact students' mental health. So not only will it allow wimpy students to navigate difficult situations, it will also allow them to stick up for themselves. Mental health is an important factor in productivity, and if we focus on the students' well-being over setting high standards, it will also allow students to be more comfortable in finding their own hobbies and finish assignments with less stress. These gladiator fights will also allow frustrated students to take out their frustrations in more appropriate situations instead of in school where we have to deal with it.
Although many teachers and gladiators find this successful, other schools who may not share the same opinions as OSA staff, seem concerned. One anonymous school reached out to Literary Arts and asked for some of the students' opinions and if they felt safe. An excited 8th student at OSA requested to be interviewed on the matter. “I’m unsure if I can live through one more fight! They have held us captive here and won’t let me leave!” Other schools found this interview helpful, saying it helped them in answering their question.
The students here at OSA can barely hold their excitement together as the roaring crowds of OSA staff cheer them on, boosting students' confidence as the staff bet on them. No more food for a week, Gregory. Maybe when you’re hungry, next time you’ll fight with more enthusiasm.
Other students requested to also be let in on the matter, wanting their opinions heard. Sadly, there are too many for us to pick! Their enthusiasm sickens me. What disgusting selfish beings. Here at OSA, we care deeply about each student! Our staff will all interview the students and make sure they feel heard!